A Rule of Life

And more.
I mentioned that monastics are generally governed by a rule.  That's a hard word for many of us.  "Rule" sounds like something to obey, something to get in trouble over.  So let me say a little about a rule, and how you can make one.

First, some trivia.  "Rule" comes from the Latin regula, trellis.  If we grow, we can use a framework and support to guide us.  A rule provides the trellis for our growth.  It names our values and offers guidelines for living them out.

Many of us live with implicit rules: "love your neighbor," "do unto others as you would have them do to you," "eat drink and be merry."  If you have been confirmed in a church (I mean really confirmed, not just going through the motions), you signed onto a rule.  It might have been called a covenant, but it's the same thing.  Values are named, actions counseled to further those values.

So: what are your values?  What do you want to stand for?  What matters to you?
Write them down.  Not a long list, don't get lost in the weeds.  Maybe five values.

Then: what actions will keep you aiming at those and growing on that path, that trellis?  You may get very concrete and specific, or it may be more general.  At some point it helps to have some specifics, so you know how you're doing.

Is prayer important to you?  Then how will you practice?
Is service to others a value?  How about care of the earth?  Health and well-being?  Justice?  What steps will you take to advance - or at least hold the line?

A rule is aspirational.  It gives us something to aim at, not to beat ourselves for failing at.  So you don't need to be afraid to fail.  Failure is how we see our need, and notice what doesn't work.

You can make a rule for yourself, but to really give it teeth I encourage you to join with someone else.  Elizabeth and I read a paragraph from our community Charism, Covenant, or Rule each day and check in on how it's going, and whether it still speaks to us.  Our other Companions check in with us and one another.  Five minutes makes all the difference.

What is the growth to which you're being called?  Who will you grow with?