Jesus Prayer continues

I've now been praying the Jesus Prayer for almost three weeks.  Here's how it's been so far.

At first I really sank into it.  I've been praying it solidly through our noon silent prayer, and then during the day when there is an open space or it came to me while doing something else.  Still not much, maybe 500 times a day.   But significant.  I'm doing it now.

So, at first I loved it.  I found the rhythm keeps running through me even when my mind wanders to other things, and I can come back to it without reproach or feeling that I failed.  In fact, it's much like centering prayer - or how I'd like to be in centering prayer, but am not!  I'm better off with a mantra of some sort.

Lately, though, I've had some trouble with it.  The world is in a shambles, and I'm praying for mercy for "me."  It feels very individualist, as though I can be saved while my community, my country, my world descend into darkness.  So sometimes I've prayed "Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on us."  But then I remember that my commitment is to do this, this way, for a month.  So I return.

As I write this, I think: asking for mercy for myself need not be an individualist or isolationist response.  I am part of the body of Christ, and I cannot receive the fullness of mercy while others are suffering.  So in praying for mercy for myself, I can indeed be praying for all those to whom I am bound by a common humanity.

The prayer can be individualistic.  If I see myself in isolation as I pray, if I see myself as separate from you, the prayer will lead me there.  But it doesn't have to.

Thanks for reading me in process, for helping me to see this.  If I didn't care about you I wouldn't be writing; and if I weren't writing, my prayer would be stuck.  So you are helping me pray!  I pray that your prayers will be answered as well.

"Show us your mercy, O God, and grant us your salvation" (Ps. 85)