Today, Thursday, marks the beginning of the three great days. During these days we will travel from the upper room to the garden, to the prison, to the cross and grave and another garden. Soon we will be back in the upper room, experiencing Christ in a new way. Tonight we begin in the upper room.
These three days are packed with meaning. We all will focus on different meanings, and all will be part of the great story. For me, these days are about God's crazy love for us, and our response.
Tonight Jesus will share his body and blood with his friends. They won't understand, I expect, although the Gospels don't record anyone asking, "Lord, what are you talking about?" or refusing to eat or drink. But they will balk at that other sign of love, the foot-washing. I suspect the eating they can overlook, as the bread and wine look like and taste like bread and wine. But there's no mistaking the foot-washing for anything other than physical touch, the humblest service. Peter balks, and I bet he's not the only one. He's the one we hear about.
Martin Smith writes that many of his retreatants identify with Peter, and my own experience is similar. In many churches most people will not come forward to have their feet washed. Even some who will wash others will not allow others to wash them. It's just too humbling to receive that touch. Perhaps some people are relieved that this year they don't have to decide!
This resistance to being loved and served by Jesus shows up in so many places in my life, and I dare say in others'. I remember as a young adult feeling sorry for those who "needed" to believe in God. You may need a crutch, that's OK, but I'm stronger than that. It took years for me to get strong enough to let myself need that love. I couldn't trust anyone's love, even those I loved, so I refused to need it. I lived half a life.
Later I did come to know God, and to rely on that Power, and my life grew. But I drew a line between "spirituality" and "religion," especially Christianity. I was not going to talk to or about Jesus. My God was still pretty vague and generic.
I still remember the day when I let Jesus love me. I prayed to God already, I had a relationship of trust, but I still hadn't let this love come to me. But one beautiful California day, in March 2000, I was sprung open. And everything changed. Who knew there was so much joy in the world?
Tonight, and these days, let Jesus love you. He's going to do it whether you consent or not. The question is whether you let yourself experience it. Let it happen.
If you're alone tonight, wash your feet and imagine - experience - Jesus washing them. If you live with others, invite them to join you in washing one another. Wet or dry, let yourself be bathed in love tonight, and through these days. Jesus is going to go much further in love than washing your feet! He is going to give himself totally. When we respond in kind, joy and love will spread - exponentially.
God be with you, today and always.
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