Tuesday in Holy Week

Isaiah 49:1-7; Psalm 71:1-14; 1 Corinthians 1:18-31; John 12:20-36

We just had this Gospel reading a week ago, on Sunday Lent V.  Lazarus has been raised, and the authorities are plotting.  Mary has anointed Jesus for death.  Now more people are coming to see him, even as his time is ending.  The range of emotions must have been staggering.  Some are feeling wonder and hope as they hear of Jesus for the first time.  Others are turning from him, disappointed that he is not acting like the Messiah they expected.  Some are likely trying to talk him out of going forward.  Others are clamoring to spend time with him while they can.  Some may have drifted away out of fear of associating with him.

And some are quietly staying and caring for him and for one another.  Some are cooking meals and making sure the rooms are clean and fires are lit.  Some are sitting with him and listening as he struggles with his future.  Some are singing psalms to him, with him, for him, to ease his mind.  

Some of them - some of us - may have all these feelings, even as we cook and clean and prepare and pray.  We may spend this week longing for a change in the story - in Jesus’ story, and in our own.  We may be angry.  We may withdraw into our intellects, understanding why this death “had to be.”  Or we may just love, just hurt, just be glad for a few moments together.

Spend some time today letting yourself feel this week deeply.  Tell Jesus what you feel, whatever it is.  Tell him what you want him to know before he departs.  If you aren't sure of the words, take a look at Psalm 71.  Is there a verse there that feels right?  If not, write one.

I have been sustained by you ever since I was born; from my mother’s womb you have been my strength; my praise shall be always of you.  (71:6)  Amen.