As monastics under a vow of poverty, we receive an allowance to cover personal items such as clothing and entertainment. Each month we turn in our receipts, and hope everything balances. This includes library fines, parking meters, donations, anything we spend "our" money on.
I did this for years with no trouble. I carried my money in an envelope, I didn't use a credit card, I wrote down everything on the envelope. We're talking very small sums here. Then, after a few years "in the world," we began the Companions and the routine began again. But this time some part of my brain seems to have worn out. Month after month my money doesn't balance. It's close, but not perfect. So I've tried using my community credit card whenever possible, so there's a record of my purchases and fewer chances to go wrong. That helps with my overall accounting, but my tiny little pool of cash is still in disarray. I try to write down everything and/or get a receipt, but I'm off. I can't even be sure how much I'm off, until Liz does the books! I'll think I'm off by $3.35, and she'll find another $5.67 missing. It's crazy, and humbling.
In college I took bookkeeping and accounting. Both times my instructors said I was a natural, meant to be an accountant. This is hilarious. Whatever aptitude I had is long gone. I wander in a world of dollars and cents. If not for Liz, it would be worse. At least she keeps me within ten dollars or so!
This may not seem like a big deal, but it's frustrating and humbling. St. Benedict counsels us to seek humility. Perhaps God has sent me this stumbling block to keep me from thinking I can do it all alone. It certainly is working!
Thank you, careful and orderly people, in all walks of life. Thank you for putting up with those of us who are challenged in those ways. Thank you for all the ways you hold together our world.
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